The Teller

As an individual whose past generations have lived in the sub-continent and the arab world, respect for women comes naturally because of the amalgamation of geographical and religious cultures.
Yes, this means:
- I will leave my seat when I see a "lady" in the bus

- Never take the dedicated "ladies" seat in the bus (which is always in the front) even if I am on crutches. Also, no "lady" will ever give her seat after seeing me in that condition (no, I am not sexist, or rascist, or meanist or any "ist", its a plain, simple fact!!!)

- I will not stand in the "ladies" queue at the counters for bill payment, in hospitals, for visas and immigration, at the police, etc even though there is hardly any "ladies" waiting and the one serving at the counter is looking at a pocket (or purse :S) mirror to check her latest Christina Aguilera look.

- Give the "lady" with 7 kids my place in the queue even though I had been waiting for two hours for my turn and she just arrived. She will take her sweet time with all her kids running around the place. Occasionally she will look at me with a fake smile with something like "What are you looking at? Suck it up biatch! I was here before you :P" written all over her face.

- If I dont give my place to the "lady" in the queue, either:
a. the person in-charge will give her my place and look at me with "Shut the $%#$ up, I can do whatever I want!!"
b. other men will become her brothers and look at me as if I am responsible for giving a bad name to "MAN"kind and I dont know how to care for my sister and her 7 children.
c. other women will look at me and think maybe he got home schooled and had no women in the house, or never got any education in the first place.

- Hold the door for the "lady" at the hotel, at a restaurant, in the elevator, entering the car etc etc

- and the list goes on.

The point of all these scenarios is simply to re-iterate to myself and to the few who read this blog, that I have ultimate respect for women and chivalry is my middle name.
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I went to the bank yesterday for a payment (no, I did not stand in a queue and no lady asked me to sacrifice my place for her).
The first lady (from the wonderful land of the locals) I met: "Hi!, mam, I need to make a payment". -- Chivalry Points = 2, I was nice to her, and I said Hi first.

First Lady: "Sir you need to see the teller, do you have the account number?"
From my wallet I took out a card that had the 16 (or 1600, makes no difference to me because I cant memorize either) digit account number and showed it to her. She pointed me to the teller and I smiled. -- Chivalry Points = 3, unconditinal smile from me while she did not care

Second Lady (first teller, from the wonderful land of the Philippines): "Yes sir, how can I help youuuu?". No smiles, pretty obvious that she was not happy to see me, which was surprising cause I never took her place in any queue ever.

Me: "Hi!, mam, I need to make a payment to this account" handing her the card. -- Chivalry Points = 2. I was nice to her, and I said Hi first

Second Lady (first teller): "Sure, ok". I realized at that point, that to make a payment, in normal circumstances, people need cash. Since there was nothing wrong with the circumstances I went to the atm to get some cash. After coming back I realized that she had already filled out the form with the account details etc.

Me: "Sorry about that. Thanks for filling in the information" -- Chivalry points = 2, I said sorry (even though I was not at fault and ....... come to think of it neither was she, but I will give myself some credit anyway because this is my blog) and also said thanks.

Second Lady (first teller): "Sir, you need to sign here and make the payment there", and she pointed me to a teller sitting right next to her about 34.8 cm away.

Me: Smiled and said "Ok, thank you", and I walked 34.8 cms. Chivalry points = 3, unconditinal smile from me while she did not care.

Third Lady (second teller, again from the wonderful land of the locals), too busy doing her own thing and ignores me completely. -- Chivalry Points = 2, I waited for her without losing it.

After some time she realizes my presence and says: "How can I help you?"

Me: "Hi, mam I need to make a payment" with a smile obviously. -- Chivaly points = 3. I was nice to her, and I said Hi first even though she ignored me.

Third Lady (second teller): "Yes, ok, how much?"

Me: I told her the amount.

Third Lady (second teller): Got up and went to her boss sitting behind her for something. At the same time I noticed the 9-inch (ok, I exaggerate but it was at least 5 inch) heel she was wearing and that too when she was all wrapped-up in an abaya. Realized that simplicity and hypocricy go hand in hand, kept quite and looked down. Chivalry Points = 10, I did not check her out and looked down.

She came back and then started writing something on the paper which was filled up by Second Lady (First teller). Its not like I have a problem with looking at women but I feel a little out of place knowing that they feel uncomfortable if a man is looking at them while they are busy doing something. Human behavior is at the peak of its honesty when it knows that no one is watching. However once it knows that someone is watching, it gets very conscious. So I continued looking down on the table or the pen or something wherein she got a feeling that I was not looking at her.

She looked up and saw me staring at the paper. I dont know what went through her mind, she smiled. Chivalry Points: -27 because she smiled and I was dumbstruck thinking "what went wrong?" or a part of me wanted to believe or think "what went right?".

I think she felt that I was checking her out. Nevetheless, I looked at her and gave her half a smile because this was very unusual and as a person who has ultimate respect for women I could not just stand there and let my chivalry go down the drain without giving her a response. She then looked at me, and smiled again. I gave her half a smile. She then smiled again. I gave her half a smile. She smiled again. This happened 6-7 times (and for some reason I tell myself that it happened many more times). I wanted to believe there was a connection but then snapped back to earth and just ignored what happened. Chivalry Points: -400, she smiled, and even though I smiled back, it does not count because she is a lady.

After the smile and the half-smile episode, to my surprise, she asked me the one thing all men want to hear from a woman at least once in their life. "Sir, can I have your name and phone number?" In normal circumstances such questions dont make a difference to me because I really dont care giving out my phone number to anyone especially to women (or ladies). Not because, "Oh!! nothing unusual, I am so cool anyway" but because I know that they will never call or there has to be a very non-flirtitious, non-romantic reason for them to ask my number. In this situation however, circumstances were not normal. I had the backing of all the smiling behind me.

In anticipation, I asked her for a pen and wrote down my name and phone number. I realized only after a few moments that it was the same form that was filled up by Second Lady(First teller) and I was writing my name and number in areas on the form that said "Customer Name (required)", "Customer Number (required)"

I left the bank without any hope. I narrated this story (with less details of course) to a friend and he was so negative about all positives that I had thought about. He said: "Maybe she took the name and number to call the police because you were checking her out".

I've not received any calls yet and for some reason I am really happy about that.

Letter to Al Danube Building Materials

I was not pissed off at all - seriously.

To: info@aldanube.com
Medium = Email
Subject = Advertisements
Purpose = Realization of the truth

Hi,
I was just watching the cricket match between Pak and Sri Lanka and had the misfortune of watching the latest Al Danube advertisement.
I understand that Al-Danube is not doing bad in terms of profits, but after looking at the lizard ad it makes me wonder if the managment puts in some of those profits towards advertising. Before this it was the "fish and water" ad which again was one of the most pointless ads I have ever seen on television.

I believe Al-Danube has gone leaps and bounds in making a mark in this market and I am sure there is a lot of respect for its products, but making ads that have lizards and blood dripping after they fall on a carrom-board with family all around is not really something that will make you win business - that is only if winning more business is the purpose. Especially in these times when the real estate is not doing too well, I think the management should understand the value of advertisements. The ad is generally gross when watched but it adds icing to the cake when one is having lunch.

I would like to suggest, that if you really want to advertise your brand, you should spend some money and hire someone who would actually understand your brand and put in the effort to make it pleasing for the audience. Also you should spend some money in hiring a company that makes better graphics. If not, you should give that money to your employees as bonus and not spend on advertising at all. That would help your brand more.

Your other ads were despising enough, this one is just horrendous. I can only pray for your brand in these difficult times.

Israel and the bank hypocrisy

I hate conflicts. I feel there is a resolution to everything if the agenda or purpose is to find a solution. In the wonderful historcal case of Israel-Palestine however, that is not true. Neither Israel nor the Palestinian leadership are really looking for a solution and the world watches people die everyday either from the backstage (USA, and other supporters of Israel) or as audiences (Saudi Arabia, arab/muslim world and non-supporters of Israel). Condemning the act has brought about nothing but casualties for the people of Gaza and muslims in general all around the world. Action requires balls from Costco (as per Russell Peters) to stand up and either fight or take diplomatic decisons by stepping on a nerve or two. Who says that the muslim world is not supporting Hamas and Hezbollah? Of course they are. By providing them with rockets that do nothing but paint the faces of Israel soldiers black.

In the wake of these attacks by Israel on the army of Gaza that has "top-of-the-line weapons and computer systems used and recognized worldwide" some interesting decisions were taken by Barclays bank and Lloyds TSB - both have presence in Dubai. Initially the news was reported in a local newspaper The National that gets published out of Abu Dhabi. No other local newspaper published the news. How do I know all this? Someone I know works for the bank and of course the internet.

The bank put a seal on accounts that had any links to the Palestinian cause or support for Hamas. Most of these accounts for obvious reasons belonged to Muslims or Muslim organizations who would send money to aid the people in Palestine and other countries. No reasons were given. When the news was published, an email was sent out to the staff detailing what "should/should not" be said if customers ask questions reagarding this issue. British Muslims called for boycotting the banks but for obvious reasons nothing happened and everyone got busy with the New Year celebrations.

If that was not enough, a new rule has come forth. Every transaction made to the bank from an account that has a Muslim name (particularly Mohammad or its variants) has to go through the sanctions department before getting approved. There is no start/end limit to the amount. Everything shoud be reported even if the person is not a bank customer. That is correct. So if I have an account in BankA and I sent some money to Barclays and my name resembles a Muslim name (which is very easy to find out nowadays), I should be reported. The staff is asked to get names, passport number, phone number etc whatever possible. They have also been given special instructions through emails sent in FAQ format to handle dissatisfied customers. When asked by the staff that this is not appropriate and whats the rationale behind it, no reason was given. Of course, no reason is needed because it is understood by default that the name is Islamic.

For obvious reasons I was a bit furious. After some thought I figured that the Israeli attack on Gaza started on Dec 27 and the news was published on Dec 28. Obviously the account(s) were closed before Dec 27 unless they were closed the same day as the news was published. The US has done nothing so far to stop the fighting but in return has rejected UNs call for a truce/ceasefire. The Bush administration is leaving and blaming Hamas for starting it whereas the incoming President Obama is not really bothered about what is happening. Oil is at its lowest and no word is coming out of Saudi or other oil rich countries except condemning the attack which goes hand in hand with the no-balls-to-do-anything theory.

I would not be surprised if it all stops as soon as Obama takes the Oval Office. Maybe this is just an opportunity for Israel to "play" a little before the new US president takes over or maybe, Bush just wanted another chapter in his retirement book - something that sounded better then "Muntadir Al-Zaidi taking a shot at the president with his shoes".

Run

Run. If I knew where, I would. Its a bright start to the tunnel but the light has dimmed so much that I cant even see where it will end. No matter what I do or try, it just does not help me go through. I can walk back to the start and find another way but why should I when I know the destination is different. I have asked, time and again and yet there has been no answer. Disappointment has its consequences but complete darkness is not what I had expected. Ah!! you human, take a look at the bright side. But where is the bright? Should I just live in the glory of the past? Was that real glory or a mistake of my imagination? If I dont know what to do, what do I do? Ah!! the wait is like a thorn - cuts and pierces through slowly inch by inch. Ah!!! the patience - a fairy I dont want to know anymore. If no one can help, who should I ask? I ask, when my plans come to an end.
I had prepared for the worse. I am no more.

The year - then, now and then again.

I have blamed time for its existence and unusual ways of bringing change. Pondered a bit on the idea and realized that I have never and will never, understand the purpose of its existence. It never stops, never turns around and can not been seen but only felt. Its path is forward and straight and it does not digress. Once gone, it leaves a sense of disbelief in the human mind making us think where it went and what was lost. The only rationale for it to be alive is to ultimately end itself.

There is a “right time” and a “bad time”, both close friends taking turns in human life to bring about change. Their combination inflicts conflicting change on human lives. If “right time” is alive and ends, it’s the start of “bad time” for some, “right time” for a few and nothing for others. If “bad time” is alive and ends, it’s the right end for the one living it, but could be the start of “bad time” for another. Do they really exist and are responsible for bringing about the change, or are they mere units of imagination called ups and downs of life?

As the sun sets and a new dawn waits, the strength of my inner pessimism wakes and shouts in despair reminding me of the time that was lost. There have been gains, but that is a satisfaction of the body which will wither as its time comes to an end. The loss on the other hand stains the soul and makes it brood over that which cannot be, that which can be, and that which could have been.

Words are a mirror to the mind, while the face and voice are a mirror to the heart. Together they explore the loss and rattle the soul. With words weak, face pale and voice trembling my mirror reflection gives me nothing.

What is, cannot be. What can be, is not. That is the puzzle. That is the game. That is the joke. That, is time.

No, I don't feel a thing
Life's going by me
But still I say
Oh God I'm making the same mistakes

Low?
I'm on empty
Try to erase all the bad times
Free?
I don't seem to be
My soul remains tied to your life

Every breath you breathe deep
I feel you circulating through me
I'll never forgive myself again
I'm so sick and tired of making the same mistakes

God help me
God help me
God help me

(Because of the corruption in the human heart)